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About Therapy

psychology therapy bethesdaWhat have I just done?

First, you picked up the phone and made the call. We set up a time to meet.

Now you’re sitting with my intake forms in your sweaty hands, and you start to think – I feel better now, maybe I don’t need to come in, what if I don’t like her or she doesn’t like me?

“The Perfect Therapist Wish List” has you in its clutches.

Looking for the right therapist is like looking for the perfect partner.

After all, we will be partners in this therapy process.

Sorry to say, but there is no perfect therapist.

Perfectionism just stalls you by using it as an excuse not to do anything, because, in the end, you won’t be happy with your decision.

So, let’s talk about finding the right therapist – a good match – for both you and the therapist. You have ideals in your mind – and you want to find the right person.

therapist in bethesda mdThe therapist has to be convenient to you (not across the Potomac!), have time to devote to you, be creative and stylish, and truly care about you.

It’s important for you to find someone who is interactive, dynamic, and wholly engaged; not someone who will silently listen and just nod their head or even doze off! The right therapist for you will be the best listener (I take a few notes lest my memory fails!).

You want to be treated with honesty and respect.

This new therapist should be someone who’s compassionate, empathic, calming, comforting, and “gets” you.

In a therapeutic relationship, you’re going to want a problem-solver who’s strong and steady enough to support you when you feel like you’re falling apart.

It’s vital that you know anything you say will not be judged and will be held in strict confidentiality.

You want to feel safe.

This is the right time for you to be thinking, “It’s all about me!”

You’ve come to the right place!

You arrive at my office… relief!

It was easier to find than I thought, the place looks ok – nice, well-kept building.

You enter my shared waiting room and try to relax, but you’re not sure what’s going to happen next –

Do I just go into her office? Do I wait here for her? I have to use the bathroom!

The bathroom is through the door to the offices. Go in, turn left, and it’s right there. Feel free to use it any time.

I’ll come out to bring you into my office.

We’ll start by getting to know each other and build some trust, though that might come slowly. We’ll work at your pace.

As we chat and exchange some questions, you’ll become a little less nervous. I realize that I am a total stranger; so, if there’s something you don’t want to talk about, let me know. We can talk about things that aren’t so uncomfortable.

If you come in and immediately start crying, no worries. You’ve been holding all of this inside, and it finally feels good to let it all out. Either way, I have lots of patience and lots of tissues.

BREATHE!

Story Time (Doesn’t everyone have a story?)

Ellen M. MillerSo, this Philly girl (can ya hear the Philly accent?) comes to the Washington, DC area to attend the University of Maryland and falls in love with a young man and this beautiful city.

Sounds like the beginning of a ho-hum romance novel.

Sorry, but that’s how it started out. Yeh, (authentic Philly!) everything was “just right” – except that the “just right” was the dream of a 20-something young woman.

Life transitions of a Philly Girl

The reality was that she didn’t like the career she had prepared for and wasn’t actually living in the beautiful city. She felt stranded in the suburbs.

She worked for a while, but it was definitely the wrong job. She missed her college friends. She and “the prince” decided to start a family and that she would be a stay-at-home mom.

They had three amazing sons, who went on to marry three just as accomplished, amazing women – any mother’s dream for sure! She was a modern woman, so her daughters-in-law called her Ellen, which was just fine. You can call her that, too!

When the grandkids came along, everyone started calling her Nana. She was very happy. (That’s the good part!)

Life transitions of a Philly GirlTime for Me!

Now, it was time to find her dream job, not knowing that it usually takes a few before you find the right one.

She became a professional photographer (some of her images are on this website!), but after four years she got tired of working Saturday nights and weekends photographing “Brides and Bar Mitzvah Boys” (and girls).

It certainly didn’t fit into the dreams of the attractive young man who wanted Saturday night date nights with her.

That didn’t work – now what?

Check! Better find a day job!

She took more classes at the community college and became a graphic designer, freelancing for a local newspaper, trying to please advertisers with the work she and the other artists had done.

She was really good at this part of the job – helping and communicating, but still didn’t feel fulfilled.

Aha Moment!

The aha moment – “That’s exactly what she wanted to do – helping and communicating!” She researched the many ways she could do that.

She decided to become a therapist and earned her MSW at The Catholic University of America. She interned at JSSA and the Family Services Agency, where she was offered a job at both organizations. She has been happy in her career ever since – and that was a long time ago!

dancing at Glen Echo BallroomLife happens

Unfortunately, the man of her dreams, in reality, didn’t work out the way she had planned – that’s life.

She followed her own advice to newly single clients and ventured out alone to do something she loved to do but hadn’t done for many years – dancing at Glen Echo Ballroom.

That’s where she found the love of her life!

What makes her happy now?

You might find her biking, hiking, skiing, dancing, traveling, reading, volunteering, or in the Pilates or Yoga studio.

After sitting all day, she longs for physical activity. She LOVES hanging out with her five grandchildren, taking them to Cabin John Park, the beach, or the theater.

You’ve probably guessed by now that the Philly girl is me.

My Life Transitions story has given me the experience to walk together with you through yours.

Please come and tell me your story.

Let’s talk! Call (301) 309-8077 for a free 15-minute consultation.